The Mystery of the Panty Theif
by Amarth9284
Summary: Therana has awoken to find her panties stolen! Azura steps in and gets Vivec and the gang to solve yet another mystery


Mystery of the Panty Thief 

One morning, in Therana's Chambers "Yawn, sun in my eyes like every morning!" Therana looks out her window she carved out and shook her fist in the air "**** sun, I told you not to shin in my face yesterday!" Suddenly a cool breeze swept through the room "Who opened my window?" She said in confusion "OH NO! My panties are gone!"  
  
Later that day in the Vivec Temple, Vivec was looking through his picture album "She was good…she was even better…oh, and she did the most wonderful things with those dentures out." Suddenly the temple door was pushed open and a priest walked in "Lord Vivec, I'm sorry for bothering you, but she just can't be reasoned with!" Vivec tilted his head "Who can't be reasoned with?" As soon as he finished, Therana pushed the priest out of the way "I have been burgled!" Vivec leaned forward "Uh, what was stolen?" Therana pointed at her hip "My panties were stolen off of me in my sleep!" Vivec sat up straite and noticed his collection of panties were out in the open "Uh, I'll get right on it." Therana smiled "Good, I want my Khajiit panties back as soon as possible." With that she left and Vivec exhaled in relieve "**** that ***** scares the **** out of me." Vivec paused and slumped over "Crap, this isn't my kind of thing, I'm no detective." Suddenly Azura appeared before him "Your going to need help on this one Vivec." With that, she summoned Almalexia, Sotha Sil, and Nerevar before him. Sotha Sil looked around "What the **** am I doing here again!?" Almalexia looked around "I brought my Fargoth!" Fargoth popped his head out of her backpack "Hey." Azura nodded "I want to three to pair together and find this culprit, this person has also stolen my panties as well." Sotha Sil laughed "What kind of panties were they?" Azura blushed "Uh…well…they are…exotic." Almalexia nudged her with her elbow "Come on, between us girls?" Azura sighed "It's a thong made from thread laced with silver." Almalexia lifted an eyebrow "And here I thought you were an old hag." Nerevar grinned "yeah, and they smell like vanilla bean too." Almalexia's eye twitched "How would you know Nery?" Nerevar quickly responded "Uh, just from what I've heard is all." Sotha Sil smiled and nodded his head "We got a playa on this team." Vivec nodded "It's perfectly apparent." Almalexia's head twitched to the side "Is this true Nery?" Nerevar shrugged "Well, it's been a few hundred years sense I last saw you…and I've been dead and you've been alive." Almalexia paused "Okay!" Everyone in the room fell down in shock. Almalexia then pulled out Fargoth "I guess little Fargoth will by my new play toy." She cooed as she held Fargoth's head to her chest. Fargoth was motionless and then a muffled "Ooooh yeah" was heard. Vivec paused and shook his head "Lest just get this over with." Sotha Sil then lifted his arm to gain attention "Oh oh oh!" Vivec looked at him and shook his head "Your not a kid Sil, what is it?" Sotha Sil then rubbed his hands together "Can we ride in the mystery mobile? Everyone turned and looked at him with a dumbfounded look "NO!"  
  
Later that day, in Tel Branora, the group was out searching for clues from the locals. 20 minutes later, they gathered by the boat. Almalexia blurted out "Someone said to go to Dagoth Ur's Citadel!" Vivec laughed "What would he want with it?" Almalexia smilled "He's the lover of Crassius Curio right?" Vivec nodded "So?" Almalexia continued "Well, it's Curio's birthday, not to mention Dagoth Ur's too!" Sotha Sil laughed "Sounds like a plan, but did anyone see any of them?" Nerevar then answered "Well, the old lady over in the shack said that she saw Dagoth Ur and Curio around here. Vivec shook his head "Okay, lets go to Ghostgate. Sotha Sil then blurted out "Can we rest here for the night?" Vivec looked up to see the sky full of stars and saw the two moons above "Well…it is late, okay." Almalexia smiled "Fargoth and I are going to share a shack over there, you guys can take that one over there." The group went to there designated shacks for the night. Inside the shack with the guys, they sat restless as they heard a woman's moans. Vivec sat up "****, I want to see what is going on!" Sotha Sil was at the door scratching at it "I wanna see!" Nerevar sat up "Why not, I haven't seen this part of her in a long long time." The guys then exited the shack and stealthily went to Almalexia's door. Vivec tried to open the door, but it was locked "****, I want in." Sotha Sil stepped forward "I'll use my open lock spell." Sotha Sil then opened the cracked the door open and peaked inside "What the ****?" Vivec squeezed his head between the door and the wall "What is it?" As Vivec looked inside, he was Almalexia in her underwear receiving a foot massage from Fargoth. Almalexia sighed "Who knew such little people had such strong hands?" Vivec moaned "**** I thought she was getting it on or something." Nerevar walked back to the guys shack "I'm going to bed guys." Vivec and Sotha Sil then followed him. Inside Almalexia's shack, the only words heard were Almalexia saying "Okay, time to get down to business!" and then followed by Fargoth "Oh, soft…yet firm."  
  
As the morning sun rose over the mountains, The group had just arrived at Ghost Gate. They traveled up into Red Mountain and soon entered Dagoth Ur's Citadel. Vivec looked around and noticed that the inside of the Citadel was now colored blue and pink "I don't believe what I'm seeing." Amalexia walked in "Pretty colors!" Nerevar followed her "I think I'm going to throw up." Sotha Sil just remained quiet as they continued through the Citadel. Soon, they found a large steel door that had a large not saying "Newly Weds." Vivec almost fell over in laughter "They got married!" Amalexia laughed "I wonder who wore the white dress?" Sotha Sil answered with a chuckle Dagoth Ur of course. Everyone paused for a few seconds as they gathered a mental image of Dagoth Ur in a white wedding dress and then burst out laughing. Nerevar opened the door and looked inside "Oh man, I think I'm going to puke." Before the group was the most unsightly image they could ever see. Dead bodies would be more pleasant than this. Almalexia giggled "Oh my." Before them stood Dagoth Ur wearing Azura's Silver thong and beside him stood Crassius Curio in Therana's Kahjiit skin panties. Dagoth Ur turned his back to Curio "This doesn't make my butt look too big does it?" Curio smiled "It makes it look nice and perky silly!" Curio then slapped him on the butt, which made Vivec almost puke. Almalexia then stepped forward to stop them but was stopped by Azura herself "Forget about it child, he can have them." Almalexia tilted her head "But why?" Azura looked over her shouder "Would you wear a pair of panties after him?" Almalexia shook her head "I guess not." Vivec slumped over "I've wasted two days on this for nothing!"  
  
And so the group left and told Therana they couldn't find her panties. Therana, however, already had a new pair and forgot about the whole thing. Vivec went back to the temple and the first thing he did was look through his panty collection and pulled out a silver looking thong and a pair of Khajitt skin panties, stuck them to his nose, and breathed deeply "They actually bought the idea that those two actually stole them."  
  
The End 


End file.
